Nobody is perfect. I see shortcomings all the time in my work and in the work of others. If in my work, the challenge is to find an effective solution.
Regardless, I find it amusing to come up with plausible(?) excuses, some of which poke fun at legitimate techniques which, done properly, yield a high-quality result that needs no excuses.
If you can think of others, please add them in the comments section.
Put a hole somewhere it shouldn’t have been? It’s for ventilation.
Crowned or sloped table top? It’s for water run-off.
Joint not flush? It’s a tactile detail.
Tool marks showing? It’s just evidence of the craftsmanship.
A run in the finish? It’s a decorative “falling water” effect.
Poorly-fit joint? It was obviously done by hand, not mass-produced by a machine.
The door or drawer doesn’t close properly? It’s probably the floor. Try moving it somewhere else.
Wrong size? Well, it was measured by hand and deviations are normal.
Door or drawer sticks closed? It’s a feature, and keeps it from opening on its own.
Door or drawer is really hard to open? It’s a security feature to keep others out.
Orange peel or dust nibs in the finish? It’s texture.
There’s a flat in the edge of a round table top? It’s to keep it from rolling.
The shelf pin holes aren’t even? It accomodates warped shelves.
The mahogany is too dark? We can paint it white.
The shelf isn’t level? It must be the level.
The handle isn’t mounted in the center? It’s to create interest.
There are screw or nail holes in the wood. It’s reclaimed material.
There’s a gap in the joint? It’s a shadow line.
Cosmetic damage ? It’s distressed.